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- Shatner in space, drunk Nicolas Cage, Jeff Probst’s making Survivor woke, billionaire trading up, and Drew Crime includes 20/20’s meathead murderer, a Brian Laundrie update, and the Murdaugh Murders.
- Justin Tucker hit the longest field goal in history just to defeat the Detroit Lions after they couldn’t stop a 4th & 19. Marc still hates Jared Goff.
- Calvin Johnson Jr. was honored at halftime while Detroit Lions fans booed the Ford family.
- Nicolas Cage is wasted in public again.
- Meghan and Not-a-Prince Harry continued lecturing everybody. We check in with the swanky bar in NYC where she was holding court, but they’re too busy for the phone.
- If you want to rock as hard as Johnny Depp maybe you should smell like him first.
- CFB Roundup: Michigan defeated Rutgers and Marc is worried. Michigan State beat Nebraska. Bowling Green upset Minnesota. Virginia Tech beat a team nobody ever heard of. Ohio State players hate Ohio State so much that they’re quitting mid-game. ITT Tech still does not have a football team.
- Naomi Osaka is making a ‘comeback’ from a self-imposed break.
- Andrew Wiggins has his religious exemption to the vaccine denied by the NBA. Kyrie Irving is a nutjob that everyone in the league seems to listen to as un-vaxxed players are being “bullied”.
- Titletown High’s Rush Propst is 100 years old, has two families and has been hospitalized with COVID-19.
- Over 10,000 teachers are expected to bail on New York City schools instead of getting vaccinated.
- Tucker Carlson has Nicki Minaj’s back. Kenneth Petty’s accuser is getting threats after breaking her silence on The Real.
- Bill Maher takes on internet outrage.
- Mitch Albom hit the nail on the head regarding the border photos. Horses are not the biggest problem at the border.
- The View put Vice President Kamala Harris in danger. Don Trump Jr. vs Ana Navarro.
- Ryan Ermanni was the big star of the Big House jumbotron. The Nine could not stop gushing about our podcast.
- White people need to get their asses OUT of the multi-cultural safe space at Arizona State University.
- Jeff Probst has realized that the word ‘guys’ is extremely offensive… just in time for the premier of Survivor’s 41st season.
- Chris Cuomo has been #MeToo’d from something that happened in 2005.
- Mingus Reedus is so hot… but he needs to stop hitting women.
- Linda Evangelista has been disfigured like Carrie Underwood and needs $50,000,000 to make her feel better. Paulina Porizkova lends her support.
- Billionaire News: Just to screw over Wally Funk, Jeff Bezos will make William Shatner the oldest person in space. Elon Musk and Grimes have broken up. John Paulson is dumping his old battle-axe to date a smoking hot diet guru. some people are saying that Bill Gates and Warren Buffet watch Ndamukong Suh have sex with women.
- DTE is so bad that no one wants their pittance. They didn’t hire BranDon once. Bloop.
- Drew Crime: 20/20 featured NFL Europe World Bowl Champion, meathead Eric Naposki and Nanette Packard. Dateline tells the tale of a murder solved after 4 years. 48 Hours covered Brian Laundrie.
- Dog the Bounty Hunter is on the hunt for some ‘Dirty’ Laundrie.
- There’s yet another documentary defending Britney Spears vs. her conservatorship.
- Every bald dude with a beard is Brian Laundrie.
- The Murdaugh Murder Podcast is back with a new vocal-fry filled episode. Mandy Matney brags about her success. Buy her a ‘coffee’ right here.
- Frank Somerville is very angry at Missing White Woman Syndrome.
- The Hunter Biden laptop was real.
- Turns out Monica Lewinsky loved banging married dudes before Bill Clinton.
- Social media is dumb but we’re on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter (Drew and Mike Show, Marc Fellhauer, Trudi Daniels and BranDon).