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- Trudi Daniels (@TrudiDan) & Marc Fellhauer (@MarcFell) are here today!
- It’s an early & possibly distracted show today. Trump tanks the market. Alec Baldwin gets another TV show. Keith Richards is sorry. Drew needs a very special friend to spend some time with him soon.
- David Hogg is everywhere doing everything. No word on Sunday’s Oscars yet.
- Ryan Seacrest is done son. But at least he has Kelly.
- #TimesUp on Alex Jones after allegedly making racist & sexually inappropriate comments.
- There is no getting rid of Omarosa
- Alec Baldwin is still inexplicably defending Woody Allen & now he’s getting a talk show that nobody will watch.
- George Clooney’s Mom & Dad adopted an adult.
- In case you thought the royal wedding couldn’t get more boring: The Spice Girls are playing
- Not saying the Jehovah’s Witnesses’ are a cult, but they are.
- GTE call block seems to have worked this time as we are unable to get a hold of the Prince
- Trudi goes to some pretty awful meetings & Drew keeps scheduling fun medical procedures
- Some chick ran out of sick days so she gave birth live on the morning show.
- FIST FM presents the FISTING of the Day: Wells Fargo closed accounts of fraud victims
- Putin unleashed some new tech at the State of the Nation address, Jackass Flats claims the new tech is soooooo 2017.
- Robert Kraft’s girlfriend had some other dudes baby
- Keith Richards says sorry to Mick Jagger over a stupid vasectomy joke & takes a whack at Taylor Swift
- Another middle school boy was raped by his hot teacher… leading to a bunch of puns
- Chris Pratt gets dumped on for praying for Kevin Smith
- Twitter wants YOU to help fix Twitter
- Drew tries to figure out ways to weasel out of his colonoscopy.
- Some dude swallowed a kilo of hash & ended up in a Tokyo prison.
- #PooWatch update: No fecal matter yet, but a slight stain on the toilet paper, Drew thinks he’s eating it
- Georgia cut Delta’s tax breaks for cutting out the NRA
- State of Michigan is cutting personal taxes
- Tabloids: Angelina Jolie is jealous, Hewitt is not Harry’s real father and Tom Cruise needs the Vagician.
- HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND!