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- Trudi Daniels (@TrudiDan) and Marc Fellhauer (@MarcFell) are here today.
- 2019 starts with a celebrity death square, Louis CK made some people mad, Kevin Spacey’s losing it, Aretha scammed the IRS, John Bobbitt bobs up and we call a payphone that isn’t a payphone.
- Happy New Year! NBC missed the countdown and Chrissy Teigen talked about her vagina… again. Anderson Cooper took shots of tequila like a champ. Meanwhile, Kathy Griffin used Twitter to vent her frustrations about her contract negotiation skills with CNN.
- Super Dave Osbourne/Marty Funkhouser, aka Bob Einstein, entered a death triangle with WWE legend Mean Gene Okurland & Ray Sawyer from Dr Hook.
- Since when is a good football game something that nobody wants to watch? Apparently, when it’s a pointless bowl game.
- Bevo didn’t like the way UGA the bulldog was eyeballing him so he broke down his barricade & attempted to stomp the little doggie.
- Trudi’s new year’s resolutions include some good ol’ fashioned murder, while BranDon attempts to lower his sugar intake & Marc resolves to establish a better work/life balance.
- People who probably haven’t ever listened to Louis C.K got very mad over Louis’ leaked set.
- Louis C.K is also in trouble because somebody dug up an old interview with Louis & Chris Rock where he uses the N word pretty freely.
- Cameron Dallas, or Dallas Cameron, took a very handsome mugshot after being arrested for assault for popping some dude in the face & giving him a bloody nose.
- Justice Beaver got a sick face tattoo to go along with his dirt ‘stache.
- Kevin Spacey is going a bit nuts going around in public wearing ski masks & putting out amateur videos edited in iMovie where he begs for his job back. SIST: How long is 3 minutes?
- The big story of 2019 are the out-of-control zoos with animals going wild & eating people.
- ‘The Kentern’ is starting her own podcast & she has a GoFundMe setup to help pay for some studio startup expenses.
- Tiffany Haddish bombed in Miami on NYE and, for some reason has people supporting her for not doing her job.
- Netflix says that 45 million people worldwide tuned into Bird Box, but after doing some independent research BranDon is suspicious somebody is flubbing the numbers.
- Escape At Danmemora was an excellent series minus the minor complaint of issues with the brightness/white balance.
- KTLA morning anchor Chris Burrous was found dead of a suspected overdose in a Days Inn with some random dude.
- The Last Days Of JFK JR is a 2 hour special on the last vestige of American royalty that died because he wasn’t instrument rated & couldn’t tell which way was up or down.
- 25 years later John Bobbitt bobs up in a new interview with ABC News about getting his junk lopped off.
- Turns out Aretha owes some taxes, but she’s dead so she wins.
- Pay-phones are almost a thing of the past so we try to give some a call, but end up calling a random family’s landline.
- Paul McCartney went all ‘T-Pain’ on his latest single Get Enough busting out some auto-tune in a Kanye-esque fashion.
- Breaking Death News: The Captain has been relieved of his life duties.
